Thursday, February 1, 2007

Attention Jared Fogle: I want my $7.38 back.

Five years ago I managed to lose about 60 lbs. by following the Subway Diet. I got really into it...I made friends with some of those "Friends of Jared" people who had those TV commercials, and I had the frequent customer cards that got me the free soda once every ten sandwiches. The people at the store knew my name, and life was good for the first few months. I started on January 15th, and by June of that year I was so disgusted with Subway sandwiches I could barely walk into the restaurant without feeling nauseous. I think by that point my body wasn't losing weight for conventional reasons so much as it was dying a slow death by boredom and atrophying in the process.

I reached my breaking point mid-summer that year and vowed to never, ever go on the Subway Diet again even though, at that point, it was the only thing that had ever worked for me. I gained all the weight back and a little more in a couple years, but my distaste for Subway still lingers, and I instintively dry heave whenever I see someone eating a 6" chicken breast on wheat. Shudder.

Today I was desperate for a portable, healthy meal so I drove to our drive-thru Subway on the way to Second Work. I decided a wrap would be more practical to eat in the car than a sandwich so I ordered a steak and cheese (no cheese) in an Atkins wrap, with Baked Lays and a diet soda. The total was $7.38 because I "upgraded" to a wrap.

And people, I can now say I have officially been privy to the biggest, most egregious food ripoff in America, second maybe only to the McSalad Shakers of yore. Have you SEEN their wraps? Mine was approximately 4" long by 3" wide...just a tiny little babydoll size sandwich I wanted to hold in the palm of my hand and caress lovingly. I had maybe a teaspoon of meat and vegetables all surrounded by this hideous, gluey, vaguely alkaline tasting wrap. To be perfectly honest, it looked like a cat turd wrapped in leather. It kind of tasted that way, too.

I think Subway needs to keep it real, and if they're going to charge 10% more for a wrap than a sandwich, then you should get 10% more stuff for your money. And since I'm feeling catty about this, you KNOW Jared Fogle is secretly feeling the same way I do about Subway, or else he wouldnt' be growing the man bosoms again.

I'm just sayin'.

9 comments:

Grumpy Chair said...

I thought he was looking a little more . . . hefty. I thought perhaps he switched from 6 inches to 12.

AFG did a post last fall or summer about how expensive "healthy" alternatives are at fast food chains.

lisa jane said...

tee hee, we dont even have drive through subway here!

The store does have a certain smell to it,now that you mention it:) Very descriptive.

Tina said...

Hi, I found your blog through Lisa Jane's blog.

I totally agree with what you are saying about Subway. They have become so stingy with the salad, that I always have to ask for extra salad.

Maccas here in Australia have introduced a pasta meal into the kids meals and it is $2 extra for 10 little pieces of pasta. How bad is that??? So you get the pasta and a tiny glass of milk for $5.95 (oh and a weenie packet of pasta sauce like the sauce packets)

I cannot believe that pasta is so expensive. It would have to be one of the cheapest things to make. It will put so many people off of buying the healthy option for their kids because it is so expensive. And it didn't fill my 8 year old daughter up at all.

I'll get off my soapbox now - lol.

I look forward to following your weight loss journey.

the veggie paparazzo said...

Not having tv anymore, I haven't seen Jared. Is he still in the commercials, but looking chunkier now?

Laura said...

Heh. I won't be trying the wraps, now. Thanks for the heads up!

Erin said...

Paparazzo, he's looking a little bit heavier in the midsection again, but it's possibly a symptom of blousing out his ubiquitous pastel button down shirts too much. I can't imagine the pressure he's under to stay slim...poor guy.

lukossmom said...

I almost spit out my drink laughing at the 'cat turd' comment!!! I hate Subway. One time I went there and got in line, wanted to get the chicken, saw that it looked gray and they put it in a little checkered paper boat and nuked it. I couldn't eat it. It's a running joke at work- Where should we eat? Subway? Puke.

Lori said...

This is really sad but the nearest Subway is 12-14 blocks from my work so I won't walk it (not to mention you past about 10-15 other GOOD places on the way).

I thought Jared was looking a little bit wider and I was thinking, what pressure that guy must have.

Erin, I was thinking how much fun you could have had describing the people at the game last night. Your subway sandwich description is proof of that. ;-)

BigAssBelle said...

oh no!!! jared's growing man boobs??

i share your distaste for those gelatinous almost slimy wrap things.

but subway tuna? divine.