Wednesday, February 14, 2007

Internal Conversation Hearts

I have a confession to make.

I've been totally slacking off this Reduxing thing, and now it's Valentine's Day and because I do not currently have a partner with whom I would've gone to see the new Hugh Grant movie and made comfortable conversation over a chain restaurant dinner, and then returned to our place of cohabitation for polite, missionary-position holiday sex, I instead chose to eat three Reese's Valentine's hearts and watch "Shall We Dance?" on TBS tonight. I really don't like Reese's cups at all, but they were a Secret Valentine gift from school and they needed to be disposed of (though not necessarily by forcing them down my esophagus).

Because we've been snowed out of work for the last two days and I only actually worked one day between the snowstorm and the bereavement leave, I've had a whole lot of time to think and to also fall out of my normal routine. Even though you wouldn't be able to tell by the stacks of papers and the bottled water graveyard at the corner of my office desk, I thrive on routine and order. My mind's constant internal monologue sort of has a Colonel Kling accent, and it barks orders at me all day, even when my body doesn't want to respond. It's usually enough to get me off the couch and into the gym, or even just awake and doing things when I really want to sleep or watch reality show marathons on basic cable. This week, though, even though my brain has been screaming "Vee must haff ordah!", the rest of me has been telling my brain to shut it and eat something chocolate. Preferably while taking a nap.

The thinking has resulted in some good things...some good plans for the immediate and far off future and I'm excited about them, but it's time to stop thinking and start doing again. I like that tomorrow is the 15th, because the 15th has always been kind of an auspicious day for me in other things. So since I have work, and routines, and many, many things to do I'm confident that means that all the other stuff will fall back into order. I'm ready to be back at the gym, and to be moving, and to be excited again.

Happy Valentine's Day, friends.


Galen said...

Happy Valentine's Day Erin!

I am really glad to see your post. I missed reading your thoughts and wisdom. It sucks being alone for this day, because of all the marketing done, I know, because I've been there. But, it is really good to see you ready to pick up and get going again on reduxing again.

I'll keep cheering for you!


BigAssBelle said...

well send some excitement down here, honey. i'm all pooped out. i hate to sound like a whiney ninny but this cold is just beastly. i keep thinking if it warms up just a little or if the wind quits for a minute or something, i'll find that excitement and motivation again.

hope today's going well for you.

I'm Fat said...

Good for you. We all have really bad times in our lives where we lose focus. Don't I know. But hang in there. You'll get back on track.